Taking Chances
by dashboardconfessions
Summary: In which Roger has a crush and is too nervous and awkward to do anything about it, and Diana wants to help. Redilio, of course! Also, I apologize if anything strays from the books. It's been a while since I read them. Please read and review!
1. Chapter 1

**So, I don't own the Gone universe, Michael Grant does, though there are a few things that I would have done differently if I had any ownership over it because of extreme feels overload. But the series was perfect, actually. **

**This is my first Gone fic, and my first slash pairing, but I mean, Redilio is my OTP. Constructive criticism welcome. Please read, review, favorite. Thanks! **

When he was able to find paper and pencils, he drew pictures. Most of the pictures were of giant flames, bright and elaborate, bursting on the page, so real and so lifelike that he had to stop drawing and focus on another subject.

Sometimes he drew Justin, when he could get Justin to sit still. The little boy was usually running wild and having fun with other children his age, the children that were left. But at night, when Roger called him in for their small, meager dinner, Justin would pose to be drawn, and most definitely, Justin was one of his favorite subjects.

Sometimes he drew the artificial sky or a particularly beautiful, artificial sunrise, or sometimes trees or the lake glistening as the fake sun set and cast glorious red and golden rays on it. But somehow, that just reminded him of fire, so he went straight back to square one.

But his favorite subject, after just a few short days on the lake, became a boy. A tall, dark, strong, and muscular boy standing guard on the main boat with a shotgun, a serious and brooding expression on his face.

Of course, Roger had to draw him from a distance, because he had never even talked to the boy, and wouldn't it be really awkward if the boy found out that Roger was drawing him? As soon as he finished his sketches, he immediately hid them away in a box underneath his bed and prayed that Diana did not ever see them. Or Justin. Justin had a big mouth.

Roger had never really asked himself what he liked. He always thought it was customary and "normal" to like girls, so that's what he did. But he knew, deep down, in the depths of his heart and mind, that he had always preferred boys. They were just so much nicer to look at, and they didn't talk as much, and they didn't stir up near as much drama. He had always thought that certain boys were cute, though he had trouble admitting it to himself, but this one was a different story. He was by far the most handsome, beautiful person that Roger had ever seen, like he had been sculpted from stone like that woman in that Greek myth that he learned about in school. The perfect boy, even with his battle scars and his messy hair. Roger hadn't ever even talked to him, and he felt like he was already in love.

It was an unreal feeling. It was like he was walking on clouds, despite the death and destruction that had been falling all around him since this transparent wall showed up. He smiled at everyone that he came across and said hello to them, people that he had never before seen or spoken to. He played with Justin and Diana and the little children, and he drew pictures on whatever paper he could find, more pictures than he had ever drawn in his entire life because he was so inspired.

And he constantly walked past the main boat in hopes that he might see the fighter, the real hero, Edilio Escobar. And he would constantly try to think of something, anything, that he could say to him, but he was far too nervous. Edilio was straight, he told himself, and even if he wasn't, he was far out of Roger's league.

"Hi! Edilio, right? How are you today?"

No, that was too…bleh. He needed a different approach.

"Hey! I think there may be a leak in my boat. Can you come and fix it for me?"

No, that wouldn't work either. There was no leak in his boat.

He could just introduce himself. That would be the easiest thing to do. Ugh, but what if he screwed it up and made a fool of himself? What if he stuttered, or, even worse, forgot his name or something?

There was too much risk of something going wrong. And he didn't think that he could handle embarrassing himself in front of Edilio. Not yet. He was too nervous, too awkward, too afraid. But one day, maybe, he would build up some courage.

He continued drawing pictures until he ran out of paper and his secret box filled up, and he realized that it was probably incredibly creepy that he was drawing someone he had never even spoken to, but he would.

One day.

No. Two weeks passed on the lake, and he still couldn't walk past the main boat without getting a tingly sensation up his spine and butterflies in his stomach. And he would think, just for a moment, that he had the courage to walk right up onto the boat and introduce himself to Edilio. But when he turned around and saw those dark eyes peering out onto the water, the courage faded away.

So he accepted, after a while, that he would never be able to do anything about his little crush on the perfect, straight boy on the boat. He accepted that he would be single, afraid and nervous, and he decided that there was nothing to be done.

That is, until Diana got into his secret box and found his drawings.


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow. I have absolutely no excuse for why this took me so long to update, other than the fact that it is my freshman year at college and I'm in the middle of my midterms right now. I'm seriously so sorry. I hope you guys can forgive me. I'll try to update faster as soon as I'm done with these tests. Please read and review! **

"What is this?"

As soon as he walked into the boat, there she was, with her usual smirk on her beautiful face and her pregnant belly starting to bulge through her clothes, though it was much too early for that. She was holding a few drawings in one hand, the box in the other, and her eyes were alight with amusement.

Roger was horrified. No, this was not supposed to happen. She was not supposed to find out about those. No one was supposed to find out. He hardly trusted Diana, and now that she held this precious piece of information, she could use it against him. He did not want people to know who he really was, not yet. But if she found out anything, she would certainly tell other people. Or blackmail him. That seemed more appropriate and realistic for Diana.

He had to play it cool.

"Um…it's a person standing on a boat," he said. "And…a person sitting on the shore."

"Mmm," Diana said, glancing at the pictures again. She put those back in the box and started to pull more out, examining them. The smirk on her face only grew wider, the amusement in her eyes more intense. "This person is featured holding a gun in quite a few of your drawings. And it's the same person in all of your drawings. Now, either this is Edilio Escobar, because it certainly looks like him, or you're drawing someone from your past that looks remarkably like Edilio Escobar. Which is it?"

Roger was an artist, not an actor. Sure, he had lied before and pretended like everything was okay, but Diana was too clever for his terrible acting skills. He would not hold out long like this.

"W-what are you talking about?" he asked, and already knew that he had screwed up. He was done. Diana already knew. But still, he continued. "That doesn't look anything like Edilio. It's just some person. I don't know."

Diana stared at him for a moment and then, dropping the drawings back into the box, took a step toward him and said, "Roger, you're an incredible artist. Everything you draw looks so realistic that I wonder if they're not pictures from a camera. That's Edilio on those drawings, I can tell. So I think you have some explaining to do to me."

He took a deep breath, trying to think of something to say, preparing to argue with her some more and deny everything that she was saying, but there was nothing more that he could say for himself. It was clearly Edilio in the pictures.

So he spilled everything to her, things that he had never told anyone else, like about the first boy that he had liked when he was in fifth grade and when all the other boys made fun of him because he liked to draw and he grew his hair out long. He told her that he had tried to make himself like girls, he really had. In fact, he went on a couple of dates with this girl Gwen because she was rather pretty and really nice to him, but he was not attracted to her and it turned out that she wasn't much attracted to him either because she thought she might like girls.

He told her everything that had happened in his life, every single thing that led up to this very moment, and he wasn't exactly sure why he was telling her, because it was Diana, after all. She was sneaky and conniving and self-centered, and she would love to use this information to get him to do whatever she wanted him to do. But despite the constant nagging in the back of his brain telling him to shut up, he continued talking, because Diana was an incredible listener, and it seemed like she genuinely cared about what he was saying, and she did not say one word until he was finished talking. No one had ever done that before.

By the end, he was crying, and he was trying to conceal it, but the tears just kept falling, and instead of mocking him and cracking jokes, like he expected, Diana used her shirt to wipe the tears away.

"Well, go ahead then," he said. "Go ahead and make fun of me. I know you want to."

Diana frowned, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear and leaning closer to him. "Why would I do that? That would be cruel." She stared at him for a moment, and then she laughed, though it was humorless. "Oh, I understand. You think I don't have a heart, that I enjoy watching people cry and fall to pieces. Well, you're right, for the most part. I do enjoy tears. But not this kind of tears. You shouldn't be crying."

Roger was confused about Diana's behavior. If she was being so nice now, obviously she had plans for something later. "Why are you so…supportive? Shouldn't you be running out to tell everyone…or blackmailing me?"

Diana rolled her eyes and got up from the bed. "In a past life, I probably would, yeah. But…look, I know I've done some pretty crappy things in the past and I'm kind of sadistic and twisted, but I'm trying to redeem myself, okay? I'm trying to be better, especially now with…" She trailed off, though he saw that her gaze fell to her protruding belly. "Look, all I'm saying is, I don't think you should be afraid of who you are."

He was silent. Was he afraid of who he was? No, most certainly not. He knew who he was. He had known for a long time. What he was afraid of was the world. And rejection.

"Roger, have you ever told anyone?" Diana asked. "Besides me?"

He looked up at her, and her warm, chocolate brown eyes, usually cold and filled with hate, actually comforted him. She actually looked like she cared. Turning away, he shook his head.

"Well, there is certainly no reason for you to hide in a closet," she said, crossing her arms over her chest. "But I'm not going to force you out into the open. You'll come out when you're ready. And don't worry, I won't tell anyone. Swear." She paused, biting her lip, and then said, "Mind if I ask you a personal question, though? Why Edilio? I mean, let's be real. I wouldn't say he's the cutest person-"

"I think he is," Roger interrupted, getting up from the bed and crossing the small, cramped space to where she was. "And I think he's very kind and brave and selfless, and he should be honored as the real hero if we ever get out of here. Not Sam, not Astrid, not Quinn or Brianna or Dekka. Edilio."

Diana looked taken aback for a moment, but then she nodded, and the corner of her mouth turned up into a smile. "I couldn't agree more. But…have you ever actually talked to him?"

"Um…no," Roger answered, looking away from her. "But I mean, I'm working on it. I'm just trying to figure out what to say-"

"You don't need to figure out what to say!" Diana exclaimed. There was a mischievous gleam in her eye, which Roger did not like, and she reached over and took his hand in hers. "We're going to talk to him right now."

Roger's eyes widened. "No, Diana! We can't go and talk to him now! I have no idea what I'm going to say. I have to prepare for this-"

"Stop being ridiculous. Nothing's going to happen if you don't do something."

His heart was racing, and he started to panic as her grip tightened on his hand and she dragged him to the small door leading out of their boat. She threw it open with a determined look on her face, and he tried to resist her, digging his feet into the deck and trying to pull back. But she was dead set on her mission, and no matter how many times he tried to fight or argue back with her, she just ignored him and continued dragging him toward the main boat. For a pregnant girl, she was pretty strong.

There was no one outside on the main boat except for Sam. Diana waved at him rather flirtatiously and winked, and he waved back a little, though he looked confused.

"I don't like him," Diana explained. "Not more than a friend, anyway. I don't think that I could ever care about someone that's so genetically close to being Caine. But I do enjoy messing with him. He gets all flustered and nervous…" She threw her head back and laughed, waved at Sam again, and then she was on the move.

Roger thought that maybe he would get out of doing this. He could not think of one thing to say. Edilio was probably busy. He wasn't interested in making new friends, especially socially awkward, shy friends like Roger.

But, after some time of running around and looking for Edilio, Diana got tired of looking and just asked someone where he might be. Roger's hope had faded; he was going to have to talk to Edilio and make a fool of himself. He had honestly never been more nervous in his entire life.

"Oh, I see him now!" Diana exclaimed, once the kid pointed him out. "Look at that. He's over there with all the littles. How sweet."

Roger looked where Diana was looking, and he saw that it was indeed Edilio down on the ground helping one of the little kids with something. After a moment, he realized that the child that he was talking to was Justin, and Justin was crying.

His nerves went away, and his big brother instinct started to kick in. He released Diana's hand and ran toward them as quickly as he possibly could, calling out Justin's name.

Justin turned to look at him, wiping his tears away, and a wide smile appeared on his face. In a moment he was up, running toward Roger and screaming his name as well. They met, and Justin threw his arms around Roger's legs and squeezed him tight.

Roger picked him up and examined him to make sure that he was okay, but it seemed that the only thing that was wrong was a few scratches and scrapes on Justin's legs.

He frowned, setting Justin back down on the ground, and asked, "What happened? Did you fall down?"

"I was trying to climb a tree," Justin answered, hanging his head as if he were ashamed of himself. "I fell and hurt my knees. It's all better, though. Edilio helped me up and wiped the blood away. He talked to me until I felt better."

Roger looked up and saw that Edilio had gotten up from the ground and was coming toward them, and his nerves came back. Oh, no. He had walked right into the situation he had been trying to get out of. Oh no oh no oh no. Now he would have to speak to him. He quickly turned around, searching for Diana, but Diana was nowhere to be seen. He was all on his own.

"Hey," Edilio said. "You're Roger, I guess? Justin was talking about you before you got over here."

Roger opened his mouth to answer back, but Edilio was looking at him and actually talking to him, and it seemed that he had completely lost his voice. Edilio was much nicer to look at up close, and he had a kind smile, and the way he spoke reflected his kind nature.

Thankfully, Justin saved him. "Roger is like my big brother! He tells me stories at bedtime and draws me pictures. People call him the Artful Roger."

"I think I've heard that before," Edilio said with a smile, stretching his hand out toward Roger. "I'm Edilio."

Roger stared at him for a moment before his brain could process what Edilio was doing, and then he took Edilio's hand in his and shook it. "Um…yeah," he said. "Nice to meet you. Th-thanks for taking care of Justin. I've told him so many times not to climb trees…" He trailed off, averting his eyes.

"It's fine," Edilio said, waving it off. "They're just trying to find a little hope and joy to hang on to. Sometimes I wish I was a kid again." He bent down so that he was eye-level with Justin. "You be careful from now on, okay? Cuts and scrapes aren't any fun."

Justin nodded and smiled and clung to Roger's leg even tighter. Now he was acting shy.

It was silent then as Edilio rose to his full height again and shifted the small gun that was strapped to his hip. It took a moment for Roger to realize that maybe it was his turn to speak, since Justin had suddenly lost his ability to talk.

"Um…" Roger cleared his throat and shifted uncomfortably. Edilio's eyes were a warm, chocolate brown, and despite all the hardships that he had been through, they still managed to contain a hint of happiness. It took Roger a few seconds to recover. "Well…thanks for helping Justin. I guess…you're probably busy…so I'll take Justin back to the boat and let you get back to what you were doing."

Edilio shrugged and smiled. "Alright. I need to make a trip into the woods a little way to make sure everything is okay. But I guess I'll see you around?"

Roger felt like the entire world had melted away, and it was just him and Edilio standing there, gazing into each other's eyes. He was barely conscious of Justin's presence, until Justin started tugging on his pants and brought him back to awareness. He managed to nod.

"Yeah…yeah, see you around then."

Edilio smiled at him and waved, and then walked away. Roger couldn't help but watch him go, walking toward the forest with a calm confidence and the perfect posture of a soldier. He had thought Edilio was one of the greatest people that he had ever seen from afar, but from up close, he was even better. A boy with a kind smile and a good heart, one who would stop what he was doing to wipe a child's tears away.

Justin had to tug at Roger's pants again to get his attention. "I'm hungry. Do we have any food at home?"

Roger looked down at him and ruffled his hair. "We have a little, yeah. Let's go get some!"

Justin smiled widely. "Can I ride on your back?"

"Well, I don't see why not!" Roger exclaimed, bending down so that Justin could hop onto his back. Justin giggled and climbed on, and Roger started toward their boat, where it was anchored at the shore just a few hundred yards away.

"Hey, Roger?" Justin said, laying his head down on Roger's shoulder. "I think Edilio is really nice. I really like him."

"Yeah?" Roger said. The way that Justin said that, it felt like he knew something, like he was giving Roger his approval. But Roger was probably just imagining that. Justin was just a five-year-old kid. "Yeah, I like him too."


End file.
